Straight Girl Crushes…

Lacey & Jessica do a little Wedding Talk 🙂 The Picture above says 1000 words annnddd The Main Top of the day – “Straight Girl Crushes seem to come with the territory when you’re a gay or bi woman. Lacey and Jessica discuss how best to handle them; honesty or avoidance?”


10 Responses to “Straight Girl Crushes…”

  1. 1 dens13
    March 16, 2010 at 6:42 pm

    Ohhhhh straight girl crushes…. what a topic! Yep, we ALL have them….

    Its funny though- it wasn’t until AFTER I came to terms w/my sexuality and actually came out, that I was able to realize just how many straight girl crushes I had when I was younger- in high school, etc. Back then, I WAS the straight girl (or so I thought) who had all these strange feelings about girls that I thought were pretty and wonderful….Sorta like your story, Lacey. I didn’t quite realize that not every girl was going around admiring her friends’ hair, smile, body, personality as much as I was!!!

    Its very amusing to take a trip down memory lane now and remember all those crushes…each and every one contributed in its own little way to my realization of liking girls and wanting to do more than daydream about them in Biology class 😉

    Great vlog as always, ladies….PS just saw that this was Episode 19, WOW! that is awesome… you’re battin’ 1000 so far! 🙂

    much love from Boston as always

  2. 2 Erica
    March 16, 2010 at 8:59 pm

    Great picture – very graceful looking lift!

    I completely agree that Rachel McAdams is MUY CALIENTE! It’s nice to be surrounded by like-minded individuals ☺!

    What about if a straight girl crush turns into a relationship? I’ve been in a “relationship” with a girl who identifies as straight for a couple years. However, she says that we’re not in a relationship, but we do everything that people in relationships do. Also, we practically live together, have pets together, the whole nine.

    To be honest, I feel crazy even saying this because the writing is on the wall. One of the biggest issues is that I’m in love with this girl, like want to marry type of in love. She says she loves me too, and her actions say it, but her words don’t. The other issue is that this person is also my best friend…damn this sounds so Springerish! I keep thinking that I’m being an eternal optimist and she’ll come around, but I’m starting to feel like the eternal fool.

    It looks like I’m in a catch 22 on this. Any advice ladies? I think I’m in need of some brutal honesty.

  3. 3 Ka
    March 17, 2010 at 5:07 am

    Yep, I have straight girl crushes, but not too many. Especially in college, girls are minority in my classes. This is a sad thing for math and science lesbian. Also, most of the science and math people don’t know how to dress up. The reason may be our brains are not working in this part or too busy to deal with the numbers. I am curious about how to deal with a no romantic girl friend.

  4. March 22, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    Hey Ladies!

    Hang in there… Here’s the truth about love. It is not like the movies, we can have moments of bliss but for the most part it involves a lot of give and take and communication in order to make it beautiful and lasting.

    With GREAT risk comes GREAT reward. If you want to feeelll great love you must give great love. YOU must risk feeling vulnerable in order to feel strong. You must risk your heart. Soooo if you do love a straight girl and want to take it further. Have an honest conversation with her… Tell her. Communicate from your heart and that is always undeniable. Tell her you are scared, tell her you don’t want to lose her… Get in touch with your true emotions. What are the pros and cons of telling her your true feelings.

    Is it worth maybe losing her to set your soul free? OHhhh the crushes. I say RISK IT baby… It almost always helps you to grow as a human being when you are willing to go outside of your comfort zone to be real. Let go of your fear and be the person you were born to be, a warrior.


  5. March 22, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    You must risk breaking your heart to find true love… that is why it’s so wonderful and so scary at the same time. xoxox

  6. 6 Nancy
    March 26, 2010 at 11:38 pm

    Thanks for those amazing words, Lacey. What I think I need is those words you’ve said in my ears(so I know I’m doing the right thing and I’ll be focused) when I’m around her, and I’m feeling all those feelings.

  7. 7 i9jah
    March 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

    Hello Girls!

    First of all, your doing a great work with this blog! Puting a face (pretty ones) on subject that are not easily broth up, especially by lesbian community. And it had got me and my girlfriend thinking – We should open a lesbian blog!

    One more thing, i am from switzerland but im living in brazil, just to show u girls how far u reach people. And really make a diference. Since i don t live in sao paulo, but in a small town, i feel all the prejudice that people still have. And i hope that with my blog, as yours, will help people get to know more about lesbian and accept the diversity of humanity.

    Give you my best!


  8. 8 Annette
    April 8, 2010 at 6:54 pm

    Hello Ladies,

    I am very grateful for such an inviting and insightful site for lesbians. Well done! I do have a question about the Straight Girl Crush topic. What does it mean when you try to tell a straight woman that you are gay but she stops you everytime that you try to tell her? I have been friends with this straight woman in another country for over 10 years and she has never asks me about my love life or lets me tell her about my wife. She has said that I am a mystery and she prefers it to stay that way. What does this mean?


  9. 9 paige
    December 14, 2011 at 3:41 am

    That was amazing and helped me a lot. You two remind me off the girl that I like. I finally worked up the nerve to tell her how I felt and she feels the same way. I told her, im not gay or bi and I guess I’m not even straight but if I fall for somebody then I just do and it ended up being you. She’s two years older and absolutely amazing. We’re getting to know each other and hopefully we will work out. Thankyou for making this video!

  10. 10 Charly
    October 6, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    Lacey and Jessica, HELLO DARLINGS!! I’ve just found your vlog in these past two weeks and this little diddy of a segment was the one that brought me to you as I was researching this ever painful, right of passage known as the “girl crush”… Now, although I’ve had crushes on women since I was a kid (not sexualized then, more dreamy feelings of love and closeness), I’m still a late bloomer. So, in the spirit of my perfected gift of lateness, this post of mine is a couple of years after this fantastic video “lesson” aired… regardless, I really must convey to you just how instrumental you both have been to me in these short two weeks… and I truly hope that you both read this sometime so that you’re once again reminded and rewarded from knowing how much your open hearts, open minds and beautifully open Souls continue to teach and affect people… you are MIRRORS for us, allowing shifts into more authentic connections, our divine essence… And here’s how you did this in just a few short moments for me, my darlings:
    This segment FINALLY OPENED the door to CLARITY and UNDERSTANDING of a complex, and very subtle issue, which I’ve been running into for YEARS. Various “straight” friends have thrown this subtle, yet unmistakable, sexual/flirty intimate energy at me – and Jessica, I know you’ll get me on the energy reading here – I mean, I’ve been flirted with outright… And I’m an Aries, too, Lacey… so, WE MEAN IT IF WE DO OR SAY IT… one friend even let me massage her half naked, one started to “pop kiss” me hello and goodbye a week after we hung out (I don’t kiss my friends on the lips!), and one straight out said she just felt compelled to flirt with me even though I asked her not to for the sake of the “friendship”… when I respond and react, and start somehow trying talk about it (indirectly mostly)… they DENY or start to create distance between us, bring in their other friends and “OUT” my crushy feelings and I get “exposed”, making ME the one with the issue/ crush… You can understand the confusion and pain that follows. The friendships are dissolved time and time again. I don’t consider myself any one particular category of sexual identification, I would be what people like to term as Bi, if I had a gun to my head, I would say so, also. But I really just fall in love, with the essence of the person, the core, and now, I just adjust to the body really… you know? What’s that called… evolved? We gotta find a catch phrase so people will be happy. Anyway, THANK YOU for addressing this and being so REAL and NORMAL about it all… and suffering through my long-winded post… the first I’ve ever done. You two are angels in my process of authentic love and authentic life. I think I have a crush on you!! LOL!! All my best take care ; )

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