09
Nov
08

The BULLSH%$#@!!! TESTS

joe-and-me

(That’s a picture of me battling the BULLSH&%$#@!!! 🙂 )

I remember a time not very long ago when I was DEEPPRREESSEEEEDDD.  I mean BAD… Not fun to be around at all.   When I saw people that were happy I thought they were faking it.  I couldn’t even understand what happy meant… In fact people that were happy kinda pissed me off  🙂

If you read this blog or if you know me personally… YOU know that I’ve made drastic changes in my life.  Being depressed is fine when you’re in it… In fact you almost want to hold onto it because its kinda easy to be down on everything – Common statements  “Why does the bad Sh*&$! always happen to me, it’s so much easier for her or him, It’s too hard, I can’t, If only I had ‘money, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a hot body’ then it would all be ok…”  But would it?

I got tired of playing the victim and hearing the same broken record over and over again.  Frankly I got tired of hearing my own bullsh&%@$… Figuring out that it was me and only me that could pull myself out of the darkness was my turning point.  It’s easy to get down on life. Life can get realllyyy hard,  I’m not denying that.  BUT it’s not about how hard life is, it’s about how we handle it.  Pointing fingers and gossiping about BS does not serve anyone. In fact, it keeps us in a mindset that people are out to get us, that life’s hard, that life’s impossible… BLLAAHHH.  That’s not a way to think because it leaves us feeling hopeless.

We need to shift our focus, We need to find a way to believe that anything’s possible.  Sometimes it takes major adversity to be able to recognize just how blessed we are as human beings.  To realize that we are survivors… Overcoming adversity is a HUGE confidence builder… Finding light after being in the darkness will change you forever. 

Jessica had a couple of near death experiences due to drug abuse.  Overcoming that is what made her the survivor she is today.  Dealing with that on a day-to-day basis allows her to believe she can overcome and do anything. I was suspended from a basketball team for breaking the team code annnddd was cheated on by my first love in the same year.  After several years of zombie like behavior I snapped out of it and realized my “job” and my “girlfriend” did not define me… I define me and I choose how my story ends. 

“Can’t nobody take my pride can’t nobody hold me down… OH NO, I’ve got to keep on moving!” – Mase 

Those two major events forced me to stop being such an ass and start taking responsibility for my life and myself. 

Here’s what I believe.  As human beings we take BIG EXAMS a lot.  The EXAM of life.  And in order to get into the next “grade” we have to pass the test.  BUT some people refuse to study, they keep writing the wrong answers ssooo they get held back. They refuse to recognize their weaknesses and will not make the effort to change them.  Sooooo 3rd grade FOREVER!!! 🙂

Crap I’ve been that person.  The person that says the same BULLSH&*$#… AND it kept happening to me over and over again.  It kept happening because I didn’t pass The BULLSH&%$# Test that will take me to the next level of evolution… 3rd GRADE FOREVER 🙂

Until we can recognize that the BS has everything to do with us and nothing to do with other people we will continue the negative pattern.

Common PATTERNS

  1. I hate my boss… Every boss they have ever had they hated – Hard truth, it’s not the boss. 
  2. My boyfriend is an asshole…  Stop picking assholes, maybe try going out with a nice guy
  3. I don’t understand why I’m surrounded by drama all the time – That’s the same person that says.. “Ooops I accidentally made out with my best friends boyfriend.”

Being caught in a bad pattern can last a lifetime… It’s my goal in life to reach my full potential, to be the BEST version of myself.  To continue to evolve, find bad patterns and BREAK Them. An “issue” is an issue only if we make it one.

For me it’s fun to think of life as an EXAM.  Certain grades do seem to last longer than others… but if we really want it enough anyone can graduate with honors, anyone.   All we have to do is keep moving forward and being the best we can be personally and professionally every single day.

 

 

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11 Responses to “The BULLSH%$#@!!! TESTS”


  1. 1 HB
    November 10, 2008 at 12:27 am

    Wow, good stuff!!! Love your posts…very inspirational…thank you, thank you !!!

  2. 2 eve
    November 10, 2008 at 1:10 am

    You know what, people do not develop these mottos or believe in this kind of self-motivation until it happens to them. I really think what made me create my own wisdom, the way i confronted my wounds and weaknesses to be a better person for my “one”. She held a mirror to me not that she was a perfect human, i used my relationship (in a good sense) to see what I have to work on myself. so that is true, that whatever you experience is a mirror waiting to be turned over. Experiences do not define us the way we handle them or to choose to handle them is what makes us who we are.

  3. 3 DD
    November 10, 2008 at 1:52 am

    Lacey,

    Knowing you only now (and from afar, I take your spinning classes) it is hard for me to believe that you have been anything but self assured/ healthy/ positive. We all are faced with life changes….to stay in the light while being pitched dark challenges is enormously difficult. Thank you for your inspiration.
    DD

  4. 4 Anonymous
    November 10, 2008 at 6:51 am

    Wow! This has been my FAVORITE post so far!

  5. 5 mr pinstripes
    November 10, 2008 at 4:09 pm

    Well I agree with all you say.. but those are all circumstantial and behavioral… proper depression can be a lot more debilitating- you can be fit, have a great BF or GF and a great JOB and still want to die. But even that comes in waves and is cyclical – I won’t recommend drugs for treatment.. but usually a radical shift in diet and or dialy routines helps a lot, if not a total abandonment of life stresses and 100 percent committment to your won health (mental health via bio chemical health)

    that’s my take.. i have to go learn how to spell committment, no wonder i suck at keeping them! =p

  6. 6 Stephania
    November 10, 2008 at 8:19 pm

    I’m starting to think that there might be a psychic/karmic/telepathic connexion between you two and (me) your readers.
    It’s already the second time if not the third time your post EXACTLY matches my thoughts or my mental situation. Today I had a horrible day, most of all because I realize I’m my worse ennemy and I feel that I’m never going to overcome my fears or take the “right” path for my life. It always feels like I have to fight against myself over and over again and it is exhausting. Your post gives me hope, although I’m not altogether sure that I am really a-b-l-e to do the same. I feel really stuck inside my mind and skin, without knowing how to make things better… Well, I didn’t expect to write something so depressing but I’m being truly honest and that’s where I stand for the moment.
    Thank you for devoting your life (lives) to help other people become someone they are proud of and love.

  7. 7 Rebecca
    November 10, 2008 at 10:44 pm

    We all live, love, hope, dream & fall down deep into some serious bullshit. We feel at times so jaded, overwhelmed by so many things in life- harsh, cruel realism that most can barely keep their head above it all.
    It is painful to watch you think is it my own behavior haunting me? Things are fine, we all function well-however the underlying heartbeat of daily existence falters.
    It may take time and feel as if an ending will never come but it always does. I think those who get hit hard are those who are capable of dealing with it somehow. It is the dark moments that we overcome that makes us stronger believing in ourselves more and more. Life is not some easy breezy fantasy but full of hardships and failure, It is the way we handle ourselves in such life crisis that defines us as a person. Most blame there BS on the moon or anything that’s got 2 eyes 🙂 Some get depressed, some stop having faith in G-d, some are hard to be around with yet it is safe to say more than a few of us just won’t let anything bring us down and will scratch, fight our way to success/life goals.

    Jessica glad you didn’t die on us (readers) cause blog world would be boring without you. WoW you sure lucked out! See how dare I complain? There is always someone dealing with something way more traumatic then my stupid business deal I lost.

  8. 8 Joa
    November 11, 2008 at 4:51 am

    So off-topic, but a big question I have for you two…
    When it’s 20 degrees and blizzarding, and the sun hasn’t shone in 5 days, how do I stay away from the hot cocoa and let my booty through the snow to the gym?
    I miss my old routine and life style, but I don’t think anyone can deny that crummy weather is definitely a hindrance to fitness motivation!

  9. November 11, 2008 at 5:34 pm

    Thank YOU for your wonderful comments… It’s my belief that patterns are something we can stop if we choose. I agree DEPRESSION is something all together different. If you feel suicidal, or in complete darkness you should seek professional help.

    What I’m talking about is not depression, I’m talking about the BS we get caught up in that stops us from taking our lives to the next level and feeling fulfilled.

    An example of a life pattern – I kept dating people that were not right for me prior to Jessica… I kept doing it, over and over and over again. I found myself having crushes on people who were completely ridiculous choices.

    What I realized was that I was a bit of dud so I was attracted to and attracted duds. I firmly believe if you want to have an AMAZING girlfriend, boyfriend whatever… YOU need to be AMAZING. If you want to be in a loving relationship, be loving.

    Albert Einstein once said – “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

    If you want to change your life you have to change the way you view your circumstances. If you want to change your life you have to change YOU.

    Joa – In terms of the weather… When it rains when it snows when its miserable outside, I put my head down and go to the gym. In fact I like it’s better when it’s crappy outside because I don’t want to be outside, ya know? 🙂 I find that if it’s not one thing it’s another. Please listen to what you wrote. YOU are letting the weather dictate your life. Get a big winter coat and a scarf pop in the car and get over THERE! 🙂

    Maybe find an instructor you think’s cute, that will get you to the gym… Meet a friend there, get a workout DVD you can do at home… Hell work out with me http://www.podcastgo.com/laceystonefitness … If you want to change your body you have to find a way to make a commitment, and you have to make it important enough that you won’t break your commitment.

    I don’t know what’s important to you… I don’t know what the song is you sing… Only you know, dig in deep and figure out what drives you. Once you know that you will be unstoppable.

    Don’t buy the hot cocoa… When it’s not in the house you won’t be tempted.

  10. 10 Danielle
    November 11, 2008 at 6:29 pm

    Lacey,.. love how you think you are the ruler of your own life. I couldn’t agree more. The more positive I am, the more positivity comes into my life

  11. March 27, 2014 at 6:35 am

    by natural means like your web-site and you need to look at the spelling for a lot of your content regularly. Most of them are usually filled by using transliteration problems so i to discover them quite troublesome to tell the reality however I am going to definitely give back once more.


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